Christmas Jokes:
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"Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice."
- Dave Barry
Q. How much should you spend on a Christmas turkey?
A. A poultry amount.
"The proper behaviour all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to."
- PJ O-Rourke
"Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year."
Victor Borge
Q. What’s the most popular wine at Christmas?
A. “There’s nothing good on TV!
"People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas."
- Unknown
Q. Does Santa like Christmas carols?
A. No. He’s more into wrap.
"Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice."
- Dave Barry
Q. How much should you spend on a Christmas turkey?
A. A poultry amount.
"The proper behaviour all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to."
- PJ O-Rourke
"Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year."
Victor Borge
Q. What’s the most popular wine at Christmas?
A. “There’s nothing good on TV!
"People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas."
- Unknown
Q. Does Santa like Christmas carols?
A. No. He’s more into wrap.
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